I’m just trying to figure out how to function in this chaos,
as years of memories were wiped away,
thrown away by your immaturity.
You wanted to leave, to abandon this mess you created.
Why? Why are you leaving? What did I do? Please tell me—
Oh…You were just getting bored.
Derealization kicked in, almost instantly.
Someone who meant everything to me just up and left-
left me defenseless, exploited, and vulnerable.
This feeling almost felt like a rotting sensation,
like an immense void forming inside my chest-
this aching feeling that won’t disappear,
from being abandoned by someone like you.
You were someone who I was in love with,
and I thought you were someone who was in love with me.
Every flutter of affection, every caress,
every ounce of love you gave me—
It was all just a lie.
A lie that I never recognized until the very end.
You were almost fixated on the idea of someone giving you love,
never the reality of liking me for myself.
In the end, our relationship was slammed shut,
like a swinging door.
While I gave you everything,
You gave me nothing.
Now, I’m left to exist in this bundle of chaos,
alone.
November 5, 2024 at 8:12 am
This is beautifully written. Your first stanza does an incredible job at hooking the reader and setting the tone for the rest of the poem. “Why? Why are you leaving What did I do? Please tell me— Oh…You were just getting bored.” These two lines just on their own create a huge impact and they’re only part of the first stanza! Not only that but you match this impact throughout the rest of the poem with lines such as “…like an immense void forming in my chest…” and “You were almost fixated on the idea of someone giving you love, never the reality of liking me for myself.” Amazing work, can’t wait to read more from you!
November 5, 2024 at 12:00 pm
The way you bring emotions of a past relationship to life, that is no longer present during the course of the work, is very impressive. It feels very human, and is achieved throughout all of it.